This post is sorta heavy and kinda long so

 So. 

Time to answer the most common question I receive, in one fell swoop: 

How am I enjoying my time here?

Lol this is going to be a super easy blog post cuz feelings are suuper easy to talk about.

Man, honestly; getting a glimpse into the realities of living under occupation is undeniably valuable. It's also an almost-constant reminder that I'm not on any kind of vacation; I'm not here on any sort of 'getaway' or to enjoy myself. I'm here to understand and experience what it's like to live under occupation, and those experiences absolutely take a toll on you. 

The day to day conversations are affected in sometimes subtle, always memorable ways. When you ask someone what they're doing for Palestinian Independence Day, and they say that there's no point in celebrating when children are being murdered daily by the Israeli Defense Forces. Also, they're totally restricted on travel, so where are they going to go? Or when you ask if someone's going to a festival, and find out it was cancelled because of murders that took place the past weekend in another city. Or when you see cars clustered and assume it's for a wedding but discover it's a military demonstration, which is shortly afterward met by the loud hum of Israeli planes overhead, that oftentimes fly way too close

Then you want to take a break, and go on a nice trip to Jerusalem or Nazareth, which has clean streets and good water pressure and beautiful beaches, and all it does is fill you with anger. Because how can you enjoy this when it was stolen from the friends you've been making for the last 2 months. And when your host family tells you that it used to be 100% Palestinian and they remember growing up there, and that since the Israeli's stole it, visiting, even with the proper permissions, could prove to be too dangerous for them. 

It's easy to tell yourself (cough cough *myself*) that you're aware of these things, and to process them logically. But emotions are sneaky. Overhearing a conversation in your workplace about the difficulties in your work-trip that day due to nearby violence can unexpectedly bring tears to your eyes. The same can be said for finding out that two people you're with who are chatting in Arabic are talking about their friends who have been martyred, one having been just the previous week. Or walking home and stumbling upon a giant fight that needs to be broken up by soldiers. These things tend to take your attention away from whatever you were previously thinking about, and tend to pop up in your brain at random moments weeks later. 

The constancy of everything is draining, and I've been here for 2 months. The people I know who've lived here their whole lives seem to have often adopted a sense of humor about the whole thing, because, like, what other choice do they have. It's helpless. And it's helpless to listen to them chuckle and say "we keep losing our land and our people keep being killed. And we're painted as the bad guys." Trying to figure out how to respond to such things feels exhausting in itself (there's only so many times 'wow' or 'that's so frustrating' feel like even marginally appropriate responses). 

And it's hard to escape these feelings, because...this is where you live. You hear about the violence of settlers against Palestinians, or Palestinians trying to defend themselves, or IDF soldiers harming civilians so often that you never know which incident someone is talking about when they refer to 'the latest news'. When you want to admire the view, you can't avoid seeing the ever-encroaching settlement camps that seem to get closer whenever I look at them. Even our organizations weekly newsletter contains information about local incidents, like how an elderly man picking olive trees on his land was attacked by settlers and their dogs and is now in the hospital. It really gets to be too much. 

So honestly, being here can be pretty hard. As expected. But just so you don't think it's all doom and gloom, know that personally, on a day to day basis, work and homelife are going well. I'm lucky as hell to be with the organization I'm with. They're incredible at prioritizing my safety and making me feel comfortable and at home. 

I also want to say that I'm grateful to be able to witness a disastrous and ever-important political/humanitarian situation, because it demands to be witnessed. 

And, importantly, any difficulties I'm facing does not compare the experiences of those who live here. I'm a tourist to the struggle, not a prisoner there. And even though I do think that coming here will be tremendous for my own personal growth, I can't help but hear Bo Burnham's words in my head whenever I say that: "why do you rich f**king white people view every socio-political conflict through the lens of your own self-actualization. This isn't about you." 

And it's not. It's really not about me. So thank you for keeping me and my struggles in your thoughts, and please do the same for the Palestinians subjugated to this conflict. 

If you made it to the end, gimme a fist bump 👊. Way to be. And I'll talk to you...I might not talk to you. Unless you talk to me first. Also hi mom. 

hey there its me again

Hiiiiii

guess what I'm still in Palestine. 

Just doin' Palestine stuff. 

Lol it's been a fun month. 

I'm living in a teeny tiny town of 14 000 people, where the phrase 'everyone knows everyone' could not be more literal. Most of the town is related to any of the huge families around here; my one street is comprised solely of the family members of my host family (who come over every Sunday for a Thanksgiving-level feast that sometimes includes lamb intestines). 

So truly, if you go to a cafe, or a sports game, or for a run, you'll run into people who know your family and have heard of you. Lol I went to a basketball game and chatted a little to a random person who was sitting behind me, and I mentioned that I had enjoyed playing a little bit of rugby when in high-school. Later that night while I was walking home, I was approached by a stranger who said to me "You're the guy who used to play rugby! We need you on our rugby team!" Man I swear this guy was not at the basketball game. But now I'm on a rugby team. 

The hospitality is honestly remarkable; I've been offered coffee and food at cafe's for free, and drinks for free from shopkeepers. I've also been invited into peoples houses and have eaten lots of something called Zarp, where you cook chicken in an outdoor oven that you have to seal with mud. Work has been wild and wonderful as I've been caring for 20 Palestinian folks with intellectual disabilities; they've been so immensely welcoming and fun, and the staff there are so incredibly dedicated to supporting them. 

Bahhh what else. I play frisbee. I'm training for a marathon (oh my lord there are so many hills). I'm having a lot of downtime that I'm genuinely loving. I spend evenings watching my host-grandparents play Backgammon while random American movies play on the TV. 

Lol and I've had a couple fairly silly close calls; one night I went for a run to go somewhere and Google Maps took me out of the city. I passed a few stray dogs (one of which started following me then gave up), and as it got darker and darker, I decided to take off my headphones and just heard a huuge ruckus of barking ahead of me. Then I realized there was also barking behind me; turns out there were a lot of stray dogs, and they were getting quite close, so I decided to seek the shelter of someone's driveway, where a family was just pulling in and kindly insisted on giving me a ride into the city. Then shortly after that, while on the Mount of Olives I was chased by ANOTHER dog and lost a sandal. These dogs man. 

What else. Idk. It's getting a bit chillier in the evening. I've started taking arabic classes and I wish I could say how it's going with learning Arabic in Arabic but I can't and that should tell you how it's going with learning Arabic. We have the Olive Harvest soon, which I'll be doing both at work and at home so I'm gonna have some really green fingers. 

There's more to say about the current political situation buuuut that's for another blog. Enjoy all those colorful leaves you're getting you monsters. 

Live long and prosper. 

 

its meeee

What. Is. Up. Guys 

Who knew I'd be going to Palestine eh. 

The answer is me. I did. 

Currently I'm feeling kinda sick (got a good ol cold 🙃) so I'm laying in bed at my host families' house, listening to cars honking outside (probably because of a wedding) and thinking about my first day of work tomorrow (I've been supporting people with disabilities for a long time, so I might know what to expect, but at the same time, who knows what to expect 🤷‍♂️)

What to write in this blog. I'm thinking about something a very knowledgeable and experienced Palestinian man, who runs a very important non-profit organization, said to me this past week: "if you're here for 4 days, you'll write a book. If you're here for 4 years, you'll write an article. If you're here for 40 years, you'll write nothing". 

I've been here for like 10 days, so nothing I can say can give even the narrowest account of what's going on around here. But then again, you all joined a group, so here's...something. 

I've been staying at a boarding school the last 10 days with a team of people who are also here to work for a year, and we've been travelling around to different parts of Palestine and Israel every day, meeting with all kinds of local people. They've all been insanely welcoming and hospitable, and have all had so much to say about the challenges they've overcome, continue to face, and their plans for the future in spite of it all. 

I walked along the illegal border wall that Israel put up 26 years ago (despite the UN telling them to take it down) and saw all the beautiful (and often, appropriately jarring) graffiti put there in protest by Palestinians. I was shown a children's playground that the Israeli army uses as a common test site for teargas, and saw a recorded live feed of the kids running for cover, which gave me the smallest glimpse into the type of resiliency demanded from those who live here. 

I was told several first-hand stories of resiliency. Like the Palestinian farmer who's been fighting for 32 years to not have his land illegally taken away, withstanding intentional fires, mobs and brutal personal violence. Also, of 9-year-old children getting detained and interrogated for up to 9 hours when on their way to school for false claims of rock throwing, and of the children who end up getting months or years of jail time for the same things. I've heard uncountable stories of Palestinians suddenly losing their homes by force, and walked through a Palestinian refugee camp, where 60% of the population have either masters degrees or PHDs, determined to fight back at oppression through education. 

I asked why many Palestinians have their windows boarded up, and heard that it's to prevent something called skunk-water that the Israeli army will spray into random homes at night, which can hardly be washed out and gives a horrible smell that lasts for weeks (while walking along the wall, we saw one of the skunk-water guns above us, and later on saw that it was now pointed at us. "It's so we know they're watching", I was told). 

I walked through Hebron, which is the city with the greatest amount of illegal Israeli settlers, and thus the most amount of violence in the West Bank. The main area used to be a busy Palestinian market street, but if you walk down it now you'll find it eerily quiet, and you'll only see Israeli settlers, who are often carrying automatic weapons. I found out that Israeli soldiers went through the area one night and welded the doors shut of over 1300 Palestinian businesses, whose owners were forced to leave. I learned that ambulances aren't allowed there for Palestinian emergencies, and that soldiers aren't allowed to interfere if a settler is attacking a Palestinian but are allowed to interfere if the Palestinian defends himself.

The remaining 800 Palestinians living in that area are given numbers for tracking purposes, and the remaining 3 businesses (run by incredible men I had the pleasure to meet) often have their only customers refused entry, for no reason, via mandatory Israeli checkpoints. I also learned that the current Palestinian market streets around that area are often bombarded with garbage, urine and acid from settlers living in apartments above. 

This is all a lot. But even more affecting (I'm out of school so maybe that's the wrong word who knows) is that every Palestinian I've heard talk this week has talked about restorative justice and mutual understanding as a way forward. From giving Israeli's tours of their refugee camps to starting a nonprofit based around the two groups having meetings together, I've not heard one word of violence from people who have every right to feel that way. As the man I quoted earlier said, "We want to bring Israel to their senses, not their knees". 

Of course, there's other amazing things to mention, like Israeli centers for non-violence and how leftist Israeli's have made public outcries for Palestinian rights, and how tasty the food is (oh my lord), and how crazy the driving is (oh my loooorrdd), but this blog is long. And I keep sneezing. Goodbye.